A brief recap...starting in the last week of September we had Aaron, who is a driver for a large courier chain.
Aaron sleeps with his 100+pound pitbull mix dog, the hair on his arms had hair I SWEAR, said he was 5'8" and was barely the same height as me - 5'5", maybe 5'51/2" in sneakers. He was late, after I went to his neighborhood...a cardinal sin, but the main similarity in ALL THREE of my bad dates so far this fall. Go figure. He'd seemed really nice and sweet when we were talking on the phone and texting, but when we came face to face, there was absolutely zero chemistry...I've had better chemistry with waiters at Boston Pizza. I will say, he paid for our drinks, and walked me to my car, and never bothered to message me again - I'm thinking the lack of spark was mutual. That, or he picked up the crazy I was throwing down. I started talking about how many babies I want, and how crazy my family is, and told him I've got a temper...none of which scared him off. It was bizarre! I think me beating a path for my car and putting the door between us was his hint though. I do wish him all the best though, we just weren't a match.
After that came the Big Gay Whistler Wedding for my friend and his new hubby. I had high hopes of meeting up with a lovely bearded Scotsman I'd gone out with last fall when he was in the city...sadly, our schedules didn't match up, and I was left messaging a guy name Stew I'd met online.
Stew and I had been talking for about a week off and on at that point, and he'd just gotten back from visiting his hometown in the maritimes. Shock of shocks, he asked me out on a proper date (to a BC Lions game...meh), and didn't mention sex or even make an innuendo once. He was the picture of polite and I was really looking forward to finally meeting a nice guy. A few days later, once I was back in town, we decided to meet up for a drink rather than wait for the game day to roll around. Boy am I glad we did... Once again, I drove out to where he lived, and once again, my date was late. For the first time in my life I nearly walked out of a pub before a date arrived! He kept texting and saying he was 5 or 10 minutes away, and when he finally showed up he was 35 minutes late. He ordered 2 pounds of hot wings and a caesar, and proceeded to dunk his fingers in his glass to fish out the garnish, and then attacked this plate of wings and just...sauce...everywhere...talking around it, and he did. not. shut. up. He was wiry and pale, and sat sort of hunched over like someone was going to sneak up and take his food. I was regaled with several bizarre tales about how difficult his life has been since moving to BC, and how he actually hates working and all the people out here, but that he's just got to keep going. I didn't even order a drink...I sipped water...and after about 45 minutes I finally made my excuses and went to leave - he insisted on walking me to my car. The waitress didn't know what to make of him, she kept walking past and making faces at his back, picking up stuff he'd knocked off the bar station next to him or his jacket he dropped multiple times. It was something else... I did the slow fade on that one and he didn't really seem terribly bothered in the end. Home to Netflix and scotch that night.
(Not that I have all of these...but I'd like them haha)
So, part of this is on me - I should have left when Stew was more than 10 minutes late, and really I shouldn't have gone out of my way to go to meet them. That being said, it's interesting just how many men are willing to behave like total prats and don't seem to get that they're not showing ANY manners to their dates.
What's the opinion on how much effort to put into a date? Should we women be asking, or driving out of our way, and putting all the effort in, or should we require men to prove their interest?
And more importantly, why do I keep getting treated like an option, rather than a prize?
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