Ok, so, I did not think that this much time had gone by...but the last time I posted was August 23. How the heck did that happen?!?!?
I'll try and summarize things and put up a few posts through the next few days, and we'll go from there. Hopefully with 2013 on its way in I'll find more time to keep up with this!
Cheers!
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Thursday, August 16, 2012
35 Days til 30: Long time no blog!
Wow, so, it was mid July the last time I blogged...so much time has just flown by this last month or so!!
1) I got to go to my sister-in-law's 20 week ultrasound on July 28th...and we found out she's having a girl. I got to see my niece for the first time!! SO excited to meet her in December.
2) I had an amazing job opportunity come my way, interviewed for it and got through the reference check and testing fine...it was mine - until someone internal at the institution I was applying to got wind and went to their union/labor board etc.
3) As a result of that crushing defeat (I was crushed for about a week, over it now....lol) I decided to sign up for a bookkeeping/accounting course, and a payroll course for the fall. Might as well upgrade/gain some skills right??
4) Fell behind on going to the gym, mainly because of the heat...but am still doing my best to go as regularly as possible.
5) Discovered I don't hate public pools and swimming that much in the heat. Will be repeating that as often as possible!
Right! So! Now that we're all caught up to about a week ago, we can move forward haha
Last night I had a great workout with my friend C at the SFU fitness center, and hopefully I'll manage to drag her Wednesday evenings for the foreseeable future. It was a blast and it's nice going with a friend and it helps distract me from the hard work. Plus if we can motivate each other, so much the better, right?
I've got the sewing/craft room half organized...still need to get a table, and maybe clear out the too small or just don't wear anymore clothes. I'm getting there!
More updates soon!
1) I got to go to my sister-in-law's 20 week ultrasound on July 28th...and we found out she's having a girl. I got to see my niece for the first time!! SO excited to meet her in December.
2) I had an amazing job opportunity come my way, interviewed for it and got through the reference check and testing fine...it was mine - until someone internal at the institution I was applying to got wind and went to their union/labor board etc.
3) As a result of that crushing defeat (I was crushed for about a week, over it now....lol) I decided to sign up for a bookkeeping/accounting course, and a payroll course for the fall. Might as well upgrade/gain some skills right??
4) Fell behind on going to the gym, mainly because of the heat...but am still doing my best to go as regularly as possible.
5) Discovered I don't hate public pools and swimming that much in the heat. Will be repeating that as often as possible!
Right! So! Now that we're all caught up to about a week ago, we can move forward haha
Last night I had a great workout with my friend C at the SFU fitness center, and hopefully I'll manage to drag her Wednesday evenings for the foreseeable future. It was a blast and it's nice going with a friend and it helps distract me from the hard work. Plus if we can motivate each other, so much the better, right?
I've got the sewing/craft room half organized...still need to get a table, and maybe clear out the too small or just don't wear anymore clothes. I'm getting there!
More updates soon!
Monday, June 25, 2012
13 Weeks to 30: Monday - Thanks universe, for sending another freak my way!!!
So, for all you folks who wonder where I find the freaks...here's a case in point. I don't find them, they find ME!
I went to Chapters yesterday out on Pinetree, because they were supposed to have a couple of books I wanted (even though it turned out stock was inaccurate online, boo!!), and ended up getting help from a super cute guy working there. Now, he was nice and normal and I posted a Missed Connection on Craigslist because I figured, what's the worst that could happen?
Answer: some strange guy named Darrell who was NOT the cute Chapters guy could email and try to strike something up, all the while alternating between creepy and nice...but then ending up on creepy for the final descent.
What started off as a nice enough "Did you have any luck from your posting? You sounded sweet..." turned into "I'm ok with the church thing, are you ok that I'm bi?" Oh yes, there was more fun after that. I tried pulling out all the stops, like "I'm super involved with church, go every Sunday, have made a decision not to be sexually active until I'm in a totally committed relationship and have a guarantee of good health, and I'm looking for the one and want to have kids in the next 5 years"
None of that scared him off...instead, the idea of marriage and kids apparently fits into a fetish he has for getting the woman he someday marries pregnant and getting to have sex with her pregnant...and something to do with breast milk...I've stopped trying to figure it all out at this point. Oh yeah, he was special...he said "That's why I'm waiting for the right girl"
Uh huh...which is why you're bi right? He asked if I'd ever been with 2 guys at one point in the conversation. I just sat there and thought about it for a minute...wondering...should I have some fun with this and see what reaction different responses I give could garner? Or should I just be honest and shoot from the hip...I went with honest and said "Nope, and it's definitely not on my bucket list." I totally didn't expect him to say "That's ok, I only have relationships with women." So I was dying to know and asked "But you have sex with men?" He said, "Only in threesomes, and I don't need to have them, they're just a nice bonus."
Oh, he also wanted to talk about all sorts of intimate things, and asked for a picture that 'showcased' my boobs. Yeah that request was denied...
So, I gave it one more shot, asked him some normal human being conversation "get to know you" questions. I joked that he was avoiding them, and his response was "I don't really give a shit. Sorry. If you don't want to talk to me then that's cool."
And that was that. After a whole whack of emails and some texts. So bizarre.
I guess when I joked that the universe wasn't giving me much dating fodder for this blog, I should have been careful what I wished for.
But hey, at least I'm ditching them quicker...this one didn't even make it to the first date...that's progress right?
SERIOUSLY, where do they all come from, and why do they feel the draw to contact ME?!!?!? LOL I'm completely flabbergasted...
It would be nice to meet a keeper though...where the heck are they all hiding??
And more importantly, are there ANY nice, single, straight, sane, at least moderately attractive 20 or 30 something Anglican men in the Lower Mainland? Come on...is it asking sooooo much?
Anyone know any? LOL
I went to Chapters yesterday out on Pinetree, because they were supposed to have a couple of books I wanted (even though it turned out stock was inaccurate online, boo!!), and ended up getting help from a super cute guy working there. Now, he was nice and normal and I posted a Missed Connection on Craigslist because I figured, what's the worst that could happen?
Answer: some strange guy named Darrell who was NOT the cute Chapters guy could email and try to strike something up, all the while alternating between creepy and nice...but then ending up on creepy for the final descent.
What started off as a nice enough "Did you have any luck from your posting? You sounded sweet..." turned into "I'm ok with the church thing, are you ok that I'm bi?" Oh yes, there was more fun after that. I tried pulling out all the stops, like "I'm super involved with church, go every Sunday, have made a decision not to be sexually active until I'm in a totally committed relationship and have a guarantee of good health, and I'm looking for the one and want to have kids in the next 5 years"
None of that scared him off...instead, the idea of marriage and kids apparently fits into a fetish he has for getting the woman he someday marries pregnant and getting to have sex with her pregnant...and something to do with breast milk...I've stopped trying to figure it all out at this point. Oh yeah, he was special...he said "That's why I'm waiting for the right girl"
Uh huh...which is why you're bi right? He asked if I'd ever been with 2 guys at one point in the conversation. I just sat there and thought about it for a minute...wondering...should I have some fun with this and see what reaction different responses I give could garner? Or should I just be honest and shoot from the hip...I went with honest and said "Nope, and it's definitely not on my bucket list." I totally didn't expect him to say "That's ok, I only have relationships with women." So I was dying to know and asked "But you have sex with men?" He said, "Only in threesomes, and I don't need to have them, they're just a nice bonus."
Oh, he also wanted to talk about all sorts of intimate things, and asked for a picture that 'showcased' my boobs. Yeah that request was denied...
So, I gave it one more shot, asked him some normal human being conversation "get to know you" questions. I joked that he was avoiding them, and his response was "I don't really give a shit. Sorry. If you don't want to talk to me then that's cool."
And that was that. After a whole whack of emails and some texts. So bizarre.
I guess when I joked that the universe wasn't giving me much dating fodder for this blog, I should have been careful what I wished for.
But hey, at least I'm ditching them quicker...this one didn't even make it to the first date...that's progress right?
SERIOUSLY, where do they all come from, and why do they feel the draw to contact ME?!!?!? LOL I'm completely flabbergasted...
It would be nice to meet a keeper though...where the heck are they all hiding??
And more importantly, are there ANY nice, single, straight, sane, at least moderately attractive 20 or 30 something Anglican men in the Lower Mainland? Come on...is it asking sooooo much?
Anyone know any? LOL
Monday, June 18, 2012
14 Weeks to 30: Monday - Oh the paaaaaain!!!
Well, I'd like to say I did it...but I can't. What's "it" you ask? Well, in conversations at work a colleague of mine said I should get out and just do the Grouse Grind, prepped or not, to give myself a benchmark. I considered, and mentioned it to my ex-roomie and friend M...she disagreed. She thought the BCMC trail which runs parallel to the Grind might be better for a first attempt at the summit.
SO, Sunday morning (yesterday), on a typically gray, drizzly, humid June day, I met her at the base of Grouse Mountain. Once we determined where the trail was (Grouse staff are not allowed, nor do they want to tell you where BCMC starts...even though you still get to the top and have to pay to download anyways...go figure) from a search & rescue employee, we set off. I packed a couple of pieces of fruit and my platypus water bladder with 2L of water in it. Nothing heavy, just enough to keep me hydrated hands free and provide a wee bit of energy if the need arose.
M's boyfriend D was smart enough to send his snow shoe/trekking poles, with the advice to M that it would probably be a good thing for me to use them. Boy did he know what he was talking about! The poles made ALL the difference, if I hadn't had them I doubt I would have made it as far as I did in the end.
So, there's 160 numbered markers on the BCMC trail...apparently (I discovered upon researching once I got home...) they're roughly every 20m of distance on the trail. It's a 3.2ish km hike, with about 850m elevation gain. Apparently #31 is 1/4 of the way up elevation wise, so making it to 35 we made it between 1/4 and 1/3...700m distance based on the markers, and from a topographical map I referenced, about 200m elevation gain. I crapped out at #35...we'd been toodling along, I'd been doing alright taking lots of breaks (this took us an hour and a bit to reach btw), but around the approach to #35 I started feeling queasy, and I just couldn't go on. As M reminded me, if we went further and I totally lost my strength or started having issues, there's no way for search & rescue to get in. I'd have to turn back.
So we turned back, and let me tell you, it was a hard climb down...almost as hard as going up, because of the stress on my knees and the worry about foot placement, etcetera. Again, the poles proved invaluable (remind me to get a set...they're expensive, but worth it!!). M has been rock climbing for a couple of years, so she's learned a lot about trusting her footing, I on the other hand have just gotten over a chest & sinus cold, and haven't been as active as I should be for a long time...I'm also quite overweight so it's pretty stressful on my body to do these things - but I'm still going to do them!! No better way to get fit and feel good than to indulge in outdoor activities.
SO...in the end we made the trip back down, and then took the gondola up to have lunch atop Grouse Mountain (since I'd invested in the $99+HST Annual Locals pass before the adventure started, thinking glibly we'd be making it up and downloading hahaha...d'oh!!). It was a nice lunch, but by the time we got to the car I was done. Sadly I decided to go to Richmond Ikea, which turned out to be a waste of time, and then got lost and went through the tunnel and ended up in South Delta instead of on Westminster Hwy headed back to New Westminster. Double d'oh. Argh. I'm directionally challenged sometimes...but oddly enough I can navigate Dublin, Galway, Belfast and Derry...even though 3 of those towns I've spent a grand total of about 72 hours in each one...but home? Pffft, who needs to know how to get from Richmond to New West...?? Sheesh!!
So, the moral of this tale? I'm going to do some less steep, but longer distance hikes for the next several weeks, then I'll work on elevation gain training. I forsee the stair climber at the gym in my future..as long as it stops making that horrible breaking clunking noise at me...
Right, my quads are KILLING me, and I have to get up for work again tomorrow...I survived Monday, but who knows how the rest of the week will treat me.
I also have a gluten free chocolate cake to give to my Fr. Mark when we meet tomorrow evening...I'm hoping flavour wins out over consistency...that darn oven makes baking so difficult!
Ok, that's enough, I'm really going to bed this time, HONEST! ;)
SO, Sunday morning (yesterday), on a typically gray, drizzly, humid June day, I met her at the base of Grouse Mountain. Once we determined where the trail was (Grouse staff are not allowed, nor do they want to tell you where BCMC starts...even though you still get to the top and have to pay to download anyways...go figure) from a search & rescue employee, we set off. I packed a couple of pieces of fruit and my platypus water bladder with 2L of water in it. Nothing heavy, just enough to keep me hydrated hands free and provide a wee bit of energy if the need arose.
M's boyfriend D was smart enough to send his snow shoe/trekking poles, with the advice to M that it would probably be a good thing for me to use them. Boy did he know what he was talking about! The poles made ALL the difference, if I hadn't had them I doubt I would have made it as far as I did in the end.
So, there's 160 numbered markers on the BCMC trail...apparently (I discovered upon researching once I got home...) they're roughly every 20m of distance on the trail. It's a 3.2ish km hike, with about 850m elevation gain. Apparently #31 is 1/4 of the way up elevation wise, so making it to 35 we made it between 1/4 and 1/3...700m distance based on the markers, and from a topographical map I referenced, about 200m elevation gain. I crapped out at #35...we'd been toodling along, I'd been doing alright taking lots of breaks (this took us an hour and a bit to reach btw), but around the approach to #35 I started feeling queasy, and I just couldn't go on. As M reminded me, if we went further and I totally lost my strength or started having issues, there's no way for search & rescue to get in. I'd have to turn back.
So we turned back, and let me tell you, it was a hard climb down...almost as hard as going up, because of the stress on my knees and the worry about foot placement, etcetera. Again, the poles proved invaluable (remind me to get a set...they're expensive, but worth it!!). M has been rock climbing for a couple of years, so she's learned a lot about trusting her footing, I on the other hand have just gotten over a chest & sinus cold, and haven't been as active as I should be for a long time...I'm also quite overweight so it's pretty stressful on my body to do these things - but I'm still going to do them!! No better way to get fit and feel good than to indulge in outdoor activities.
SO...in the end we made the trip back down, and then took the gondola up to have lunch atop Grouse Mountain (since I'd invested in the $99+HST Annual Locals pass before the adventure started, thinking glibly we'd be making it up and downloading hahaha...d'oh!!). It was a nice lunch, but by the time we got to the car I was done. Sadly I decided to go to Richmond Ikea, which turned out to be a waste of time, and then got lost and went through the tunnel and ended up in South Delta instead of on Westminster Hwy headed back to New Westminster. Double d'oh. Argh. I'm directionally challenged sometimes...but oddly enough I can navigate Dublin, Galway, Belfast and Derry...even though 3 of those towns I've spent a grand total of about 72 hours in each one...but home? Pffft, who needs to know how to get from Richmond to New West...?? Sheesh!!
So, the moral of this tale? I'm going to do some less steep, but longer distance hikes for the next several weeks, then I'll work on elevation gain training. I forsee the stair climber at the gym in my future..as long as it stops making that horrible breaking clunking noise at me...
Right, my quads are KILLING me, and I have to get up for work again tomorrow...I survived Monday, but who knows how the rest of the week will treat me.
I also have a gluten free chocolate cake to give to my Fr. Mark when we meet tomorrow evening...I'm hoping flavour wins out over consistency...that darn oven makes baking so difficult!
Ok, that's enough, I'm really going to bed this time, HONEST! ;)
Wednesday, June 13, 2012
14 Weeks to 30: Wednesday - Recycling or Closure??
Soooo...it's been a while!! I got caught by the vicious cold bug that's going around, and I think I've developed allergies thanks to the abundant cottonwood fluff all over the Lower Mainland this month!! I've been down for the count for over a week, less than fun. : (
That being said, I've got some interesting updates!!
1) We listed the house for sale.
2) We delisted the house after freaking out about it, and will instead come up with a way for the 'rents to buy out my portion of the title. I'll be there another year by the looks of it. This is ok, because it means I can save a little bit more money for now.
3) I got vacation time approved to go see M & J in South Carolina over Labour Day weekend/first week of September. Woohoo!!!! SO looking forward to catching up with the boys :D
4) I went back to the gym, just before getting sick, so the desire to keep it up is there, just waiting for the body's abilities to catch back up.
5) A guy from my past resurfaced... Sean from this entry...
http://gorgeousingreengrowth.blogspot.ca/2012/02/music-and-memory-are-funny-things.html
I managed to learn a couple of things from our encounter, and I think that there's a reason I keep running into all of these guys from my past!!
A couple of months ago I met up with a guy that I've been communicating with for almost 7 years, always saying that eventually, when we were both in the country/city/whatever, we would give it a go...see what happened. Well, after 7 years of hype and talk we did in April. I'm not going to say it was bad, it was just...underwhelming. So much thought and bravado had gone into it that it really couldn't live up to expectations. I won't be seeing him again I can guarantee that. However, I'm starting to see a trend with the 'what if' men in my life...
Last night Sean from the aforementioned entry got in touch with me. That girlfriend he has? They're "on a break"...and he wanted to know if I still wanted to know what it was like to kiss him. Now, typically I'd say no...and when he attempted to initiate an encounter about 3 or 4 years ago, I shot it down. Last night though, I got the feeling that I needed to see what happened.
It was nice to hang out with him again, it's been a REALLY long time since we just talked or chilled out together, without flinging verbal daggers back and forth (although he claims there never were any but hey...perception...whatever LOL). The encounter was...frenetic...I kind of felt like he was in puppy dog mode, the way they quiver in excitement to show their affection to their owners, as if they'll disappear without proper adulation. Not exactly what I was expecting, nor what I'm used to. It wasn't bad though, just...interesting.
In the end it was a good experience, but it left me with a lot to think about. He said right off the bat that he couldn't have it 'mean anything' in any deep sense since there's a time limit on his relationship's 'break', and I can appreciate that. I know full well that when she gets back into the province they'll get back together. He was just experimenting emotionally. Funnily enough, I think of last night as a dating experiment myself...
I finally got to see what the chemistry was like with someone I've daydreamed about off and on for years, even when we were fighting I wondered about it. I was able to experience for an evening his undivided attention and what that meant. I have to say, I think I'm glad that we never ended up dating. Our timing was always off, and our personality types didn't REALLY gel properly, and physically well...the chemistry just wasn't really there...
When I did the postmortem with a couple of gals I know they said something interesting: "you can't move on to your future until you deal with you past, and it seems like you're getting closure on some areas of your past". Funny thing is, I was sort of thinking something similar...I kept thinking of him randomly over the years, wondering what might have been, how good would it have been, and other dreck. Now I know, it would have been fine, but we'd have driven each other nuts in the long run. He's not a regret or a 'what if' anymore.
OH!! And those things I wished I had the chance to say to him?? I did, and it felt good. Wow, is this what adult closure feels like? You get to try new/old things, make sure how you feel, and still get a tender goodnight kiss when you say goodbye...no regrets, no hard feelings?
I think I could go for this adult version of dating and relating...
That being said, I've got some interesting updates!!
1) We listed the house for sale.
2) We delisted the house after freaking out about it, and will instead come up with a way for the 'rents to buy out my portion of the title. I'll be there another year by the looks of it. This is ok, because it means I can save a little bit more money for now.
3) I got vacation time approved to go see M & J in South Carolina over Labour Day weekend/first week of September. Woohoo!!!! SO looking forward to catching up with the boys :D
4) I went back to the gym, just before getting sick, so the desire to keep it up is there, just waiting for the body's abilities to catch back up.
5) A guy from my past resurfaced... Sean from this entry...
http://gorgeousingreengrowth.blogspot.ca/2012/02/music-and-memory-are-funny-things.html
I managed to learn a couple of things from our encounter, and I think that there's a reason I keep running into all of these guys from my past!!
A couple of months ago I met up with a guy that I've been communicating with for almost 7 years, always saying that eventually, when we were both in the country/city/whatever, we would give it a go...see what happened. Well, after 7 years of hype and talk we did in April. I'm not going to say it was bad, it was just...underwhelming. So much thought and bravado had gone into it that it really couldn't live up to expectations. I won't be seeing him again I can guarantee that. However, I'm starting to see a trend with the 'what if' men in my life...
Last night Sean from the aforementioned entry got in touch with me. That girlfriend he has? They're "on a break"...and he wanted to know if I still wanted to know what it was like to kiss him. Now, typically I'd say no...and when he attempted to initiate an encounter about 3 or 4 years ago, I shot it down. Last night though, I got the feeling that I needed to see what happened.
It was nice to hang out with him again, it's been a REALLY long time since we just talked or chilled out together, without flinging verbal daggers back and forth (although he claims there never were any but hey...perception...whatever LOL). The encounter was...frenetic...I kind of felt like he was in puppy dog mode, the way they quiver in excitement to show their affection to their owners, as if they'll disappear without proper adulation. Not exactly what I was expecting, nor what I'm used to. It wasn't bad though, just...interesting.
In the end it was a good experience, but it left me with a lot to think about. He said right off the bat that he couldn't have it 'mean anything' in any deep sense since there's a time limit on his relationship's 'break', and I can appreciate that. I know full well that when she gets back into the province they'll get back together. He was just experimenting emotionally. Funnily enough, I think of last night as a dating experiment myself...
I finally got to see what the chemistry was like with someone I've daydreamed about off and on for years, even when we were fighting I wondered about it. I was able to experience for an evening his undivided attention and what that meant. I have to say, I think I'm glad that we never ended up dating. Our timing was always off, and our personality types didn't REALLY gel properly, and physically well...the chemistry just wasn't really there...
When I did the postmortem with a couple of gals I know they said something interesting: "you can't move on to your future until you deal with you past, and it seems like you're getting closure on some areas of your past". Funny thing is, I was sort of thinking something similar...I kept thinking of him randomly over the years, wondering what might have been, how good would it have been, and other dreck. Now I know, it would have been fine, but we'd have driven each other nuts in the long run. He's not a regret or a 'what if' anymore.
OH!! And those things I wished I had the chance to say to him?? I did, and it felt good. Wow, is this what adult closure feels like? You get to try new/old things, make sure how you feel, and still get a tender goodnight kiss when you say goodbye...no regrets, no hard feelings?
I think I could go for this adult version of dating and relating...
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
17 Weeks to 30: Wednesday
PROGRESS!!! We have PROGRESS!!!
I think we found our realtors, they're young, enthusiastic, local, motivated and just generally nice to deal with. Next step is to start organizing/downsizing the rest of this week because they're coming back Sunday afternoon to consult on what needs to be done in order to stage the house. We'll also have to tackle the hole in my bedroom ceiling of course, just need to get it done once and for all before they bring in photographers and stagers. Woohoo!! They figure we could get an offer/have a sale in place by July. Oh man is it ever nice to feel as though this is really truly going to happen.
Tomorrow is 16 weeks til 30, so I've got to make sure I get some hill walking in tonight and tomorrow, depending on how I feel (I've had a bit of a bug lately).
Not a whole ton to share/say today since tomorrow's the big weekly writeup, but I'm just so excited that I had to say SOMETHING! lol
Here's hoping everything starts moving along now...
I think we found our realtors, they're young, enthusiastic, local, motivated and just generally nice to deal with. Next step is to start organizing/downsizing the rest of this week because they're coming back Sunday afternoon to consult on what needs to be done in order to stage the house. We'll also have to tackle the hole in my bedroom ceiling of course, just need to get it done once and for all before they bring in photographers and stagers. Woohoo!! They figure we could get an offer/have a sale in place by July. Oh man is it ever nice to feel as though this is really truly going to happen.
Tomorrow is 16 weeks til 30, so I've got to make sure I get some hill walking in tonight and tomorrow, depending on how I feel (I've had a bit of a bug lately).
Not a whole ton to share/say today since tomorrow's the big weekly writeup, but I'm just so excited that I had to say SOMETHING! lol
Here's hoping everything starts moving along now...
Thursday, May 24, 2012
17 Weeks to 30: Thursday - Argh
So, I'm completely stalled in my efforts. All of my efforts except keeping the house clean, go figure.
I've gained back all 16 pounds that I lost over the course of July-October 2011. It was gradual at first, but since I got back from Ireland I've gained 6 pounds. NOT ok!! My eating habits have been disastrous, I've been stressed out at home and feeling really blah, and found out my thyroid meds needed some tweaking. The adjustment should help, and I'll go back to eating healthier...we should see a change in a few weeks I hope???
The house is much cleaner and I'm finding it easier to keep it that way, but the renos are non-existent. Still haven't even gone to get the tiles for the ceiling. Argh indeed.
As for dating/love life...HA, let's not go there...that doesn't exist period. Although, I'm starting to reassess my previous 'type', and the way I've handled things and the manner my relationships/flings have developed in the past. Maybe it's time to find someone I can be friends with rather than someone that I feel that jolt of attraction right off the bat...is this the more adult version of dating? :p lol
I'm going to buy an exercise bike I think, the same one my sister-in-law D has. It looks pretty good and should get me started...maybe help me get the first few pounds shifted so I feel a little more energetic and up to the gym/those hikes I'm so wanting to do.
This doesn't bode well for the plan to do Grouse in 17 weeks, but I'm still determined. I'm going to get my butt moving again!!!
Here's to determination
I've gained back all 16 pounds that I lost over the course of July-October 2011. It was gradual at first, but since I got back from Ireland I've gained 6 pounds. NOT ok!! My eating habits have been disastrous, I've been stressed out at home and feeling really blah, and found out my thyroid meds needed some tweaking. The adjustment should help, and I'll go back to eating healthier...we should see a change in a few weeks I hope???
The house is much cleaner and I'm finding it easier to keep it that way, but the renos are non-existent. Still haven't even gone to get the tiles for the ceiling. Argh indeed.
As for dating/love life...HA, let's not go there...that doesn't exist period. Although, I'm starting to reassess my previous 'type', and the way I've handled things and the manner my relationships/flings have developed in the past. Maybe it's time to find someone I can be friends with rather than someone that I feel that jolt of attraction right off the bat...is this the more adult version of dating? :p lol
I'm going to buy an exercise bike I think, the same one my sister-in-law D has. It looks pretty good and should get me started...maybe help me get the first few pounds shifted so I feel a little more energetic and up to the gym/those hikes I'm so wanting to do.
This doesn't bode well for the plan to do Grouse in 17 weeks, but I'm still determined. I'm going to get my butt moving again!!!
Here's to determination
Thursday, May 17, 2012
18 weeks to 30: Thursday
It's been 2 weeks since I started trying to blog more regularly. Is it just me or is time flying by at an increasingly alarming rate??
Since Friday I've been a busy gal!!
There was a fabric sale on, I think I mentioned it...I ended up getting the materials for 2 a-line skirts, a pencil skirt, and a pair of flannel pj bottoms. I forgot to get lining for one skirt and interfacing, but thankfully there's another sale on this weekend - Victoria Day weekend. Woohoo!! I should be able to make at least one skirt this weekend, if not two. We shall see!
Saturday my back problems escalated but then seemed to subside quite suddenly...so Sunday I was able to get to church and spend some time with my friend J's kids S & D, always a wonderful experience. However, it turns out that my back wasn't totally fixed, my chiropractor had to give it a good adjustment Monday morning. He's fantastic, as soon as I told him where the pain was he knew what was up and was able to fix it. Apparently one of my ribs was out of alignment!! I had no idea that was even possible, but hey, it's fixed! :D
I got to go for a nice hike with my sister-in-law D Monday also, followed by lunch and a couple of hours of intensive organization/cleaning at my place. A HUGE dent was made, I still have a lot of work to do, but it made a big difference. It feels like someone else's livingroom LOL
Last night I got to Skype with a dear friend in South Carolina. He was sweet enough to stay up til the wee hours to keep talking. We ended up talking for almost 4 hours...apparently we had a lot to catch up on!! I'm trying my best to get him to come up to Vancouver for a visit, so we'll see how that goes.
Tonight I'm going to mass and a church potluck afterward. I've always planned to go to one, but never quite made it, so it'll be nice to finally accomplish that!! :)
Saturday I've got a play date with S & D in Vancouver, so that J can get some things done at home pre-move. They're moving closer to me (total coincidence that their awesome new home is closer!!), so I'm excited and can't wait to help in any way I can.
Hopefully I'll get a hike in somewhere this weekend, if I can find a hiking buddy!
Enjoy the sunshine!
Since Friday I've been a busy gal!!
There was a fabric sale on, I think I mentioned it...I ended up getting the materials for 2 a-line skirts, a pencil skirt, and a pair of flannel pj bottoms. I forgot to get lining for one skirt and interfacing, but thankfully there's another sale on this weekend - Victoria Day weekend. Woohoo!! I should be able to make at least one skirt this weekend, if not two. We shall see!
Saturday my back problems escalated but then seemed to subside quite suddenly...so Sunday I was able to get to church and spend some time with my friend J's kids S & D, always a wonderful experience. However, it turns out that my back wasn't totally fixed, my chiropractor had to give it a good adjustment Monday morning. He's fantastic, as soon as I told him where the pain was he knew what was up and was able to fix it. Apparently one of my ribs was out of alignment!! I had no idea that was even possible, but hey, it's fixed! :D
I got to go for a nice hike with my sister-in-law D Monday also, followed by lunch and a couple of hours of intensive organization/cleaning at my place. A HUGE dent was made, I still have a lot of work to do, but it made a big difference. It feels like someone else's livingroom LOL
Last night I got to Skype with a dear friend in South Carolina. He was sweet enough to stay up til the wee hours to keep talking. We ended up talking for almost 4 hours...apparently we had a lot to catch up on!! I'm trying my best to get him to come up to Vancouver for a visit, so we'll see how that goes.
Tonight I'm going to mass and a church potluck afterward. I've always planned to go to one, but never quite made it, so it'll be nice to finally accomplish that!! :)
Saturday I've got a play date with S & D in Vancouver, so that J can get some things done at home pre-move. They're moving closer to me (total coincidence that their awesome new home is closer!!), so I'm excited and can't wait to help in any way I can.
Hopefully I'll get a hike in somewhere this weekend, if I can find a hiking buddy!
Enjoy the sunshine!
Friday, May 11, 2012
19 Weeks til 30: Friday
It's sunny and it's Friday, what more could a girl ask for?
Well, for starters, not to have a giant painful back spasm that's lasted since Monday morning. Yup, I've been struggling through the week with the left side of my back knotted up and painful. Ibuprofen isn't helping, my old T3's aren't dulling it, and ice/heat don't seem to help past the initial numbing or soothing. Ah well, I get to see my chiropractor on Monday, I'm sure he'll fix me up!
Secondly: I discovered that my lovely, fuzzy, cantankerous kitty miss S made a bit of a mess in the laundry room. Granted, I should have noticed it at the time (2 or 3 nights ago), but it was dark, bedtime, and I had a book/bed to get to. She knocked the liquid laundry detergent bottle off the shelf over the washer. Any of you ever had to clean up something like that? I recently left the lid of one of my face washes partially unscrewed, and it got tipped over on the counter. The mess it leaves behind is just ghastly. Despite being cleaning products, these items are almost impossible to clean up properly. So my Friday night, along with back pain, will consist of moving the washing machine and wicker hamper to clean up the spilled soap. At least the floor will be nice and clean? Ah well, who could be mad at this face??
However, there's a sale on at Fabricana today only. I'm so excited. I haven't decided if I'm going right after work or if I'll wait and go with my mother, but either way, a fabric sale is something to look forward to! ;) This is important because of the effort I'm making to attempt to be more feminine (along with the fitness goals, etcetera). The goal is to wear skirts at least 3 days a week, so I need a few new skirts to add to the spring/summer rotation. I'm hoping to find some bargains on nicer material so I don't have to spend a ton, and I already have 2 patterns picked out of my collection at home. It's going to be so much fun, I love seeing how new garments turn out!
Over the weekend I'll be organizing and cleaning the house, and perhaps even tackling the ceiling issue again - we'll see. I think I'll try to get a hike in as well if I have the energy/time/my back heals a bit more.
Fingers crossed that the weather stays nice and I get everything done!
Well, for starters, not to have a giant painful back spasm that's lasted since Monday morning. Yup, I've been struggling through the week with the left side of my back knotted up and painful. Ibuprofen isn't helping, my old T3's aren't dulling it, and ice/heat don't seem to help past the initial numbing or soothing. Ah well, I get to see my chiropractor on Monday, I'm sure he'll fix me up!
Secondly: I discovered that my lovely, fuzzy, cantankerous kitty miss S made a bit of a mess in the laundry room. Granted, I should have noticed it at the time (2 or 3 nights ago), but it was dark, bedtime, and I had a book/bed to get to. She knocked the liquid laundry detergent bottle off the shelf over the washer. Any of you ever had to clean up something like that? I recently left the lid of one of my face washes partially unscrewed, and it got tipped over on the counter. The mess it leaves behind is just ghastly. Despite being cleaning products, these items are almost impossible to clean up properly. So my Friday night, along with back pain, will consist of moving the washing machine and wicker hamper to clean up the spilled soap. At least the floor will be nice and clean? Ah well, who could be mad at this face??
However, there's a sale on at Fabricana today only. I'm so excited. I haven't decided if I'm going right after work or if I'll wait and go with my mother, but either way, a fabric sale is something to look forward to! ;) This is important because of the effort I'm making to attempt to be more feminine (along with the fitness goals, etcetera). The goal is to wear skirts at least 3 days a week, so I need a few new skirts to add to the spring/summer rotation. I'm hoping to find some bargains on nicer material so I don't have to spend a ton, and I already have 2 patterns picked out of my collection at home. It's going to be so much fun, I love seeing how new garments turn out!
Over the weekend I'll be organizing and cleaning the house, and perhaps even tackling the ceiling issue again - we'll see. I think I'll try to get a hike in as well if I have the energy/time/my back heals a bit more.
Fingers crossed that the weather stays nice and I get everything done!
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Training/prep Day 6: Appearance and Effort
So, today is day 6 since deciding to embark on training/preparation for the Grouse Grind and my 30th birthday.
I walked down to the Safeway near my house one evening, and that hill nearly kicked my butt...so I seriously considered giving up the goal within 24 hours. I'm apparently ridiculously easily beaten.
I've done the hill once more since that attempt, and it wasn't so bad!!
I also went shopping with my sis-in-law D and we talked makeup, appearance, dating, being feminine...all that good stuff. The upshot of it all is that I need to soften some of my rough edges. I believe a friend I met in Ireland described me as "putting out a vibe to men that you could kick their ass"...not exactly the image one wants to convey, non?
So, on the most superficial of levels, I'm making more of an effort with my appearance. That means makeup, hair styles, manner of dress, and even making an attempt to swear less. That last one's going to take the most hard work I think. I'm going to embark on a skirt phase, attempting to wear a skirt to work 3 of 5 days per week. That will mean buying some new fabric and making a few new skirts (I have a favored pattern I can't wait to use again), but we all have sacrifices to make! ; )
Tonight I'm going for a walk with my ex-roomie M. She's a great motivator with her marathons, trail runs, swimming, rock climbing, snow shoeing and everything else she manages to do in her down time. She's recovering from an injury that's kept her from running, so she won't be as hard to keep up with for the time being. ;) Hopefully it's an energizing experience, and will push me to keep going. I know, it's only a walk, but baby steps right?
Now I just have to wake up early enough to do my makeup every morning...*that* might be a bigger challenge than you'd think...
And just to start prepping myself for "mother nature's stair master"...an image I found on Google of it...ugh! That's the halfway mark...and that's one of the nicer sections from the photos I've seen. YUCK! I'll have to start dong multiple sets of stairs every day as the summer goes on - hills just won't cut it! Wish me luck :p
I walked down to the Safeway near my house one evening, and that hill nearly kicked my butt...so I seriously considered giving up the goal within 24 hours. I'm apparently ridiculously easily beaten.
I've done the hill once more since that attempt, and it wasn't so bad!!
I also went shopping with my sis-in-law D and we talked makeup, appearance, dating, being feminine...all that good stuff. The upshot of it all is that I need to soften some of my rough edges. I believe a friend I met in Ireland described me as "putting out a vibe to men that you could kick their ass"...not exactly the image one wants to convey, non?
So, on the most superficial of levels, I'm making more of an effort with my appearance. That means makeup, hair styles, manner of dress, and even making an attempt to swear less. That last one's going to take the most hard work I think. I'm going to embark on a skirt phase, attempting to wear a skirt to work 3 of 5 days per week. That will mean buying some new fabric and making a few new skirts (I have a favored pattern I can't wait to use again), but we all have sacrifices to make! ; )
Tonight I'm going for a walk with my ex-roomie M. She's a great motivator with her marathons, trail runs, swimming, rock climbing, snow shoeing and everything else she manages to do in her down time. She's recovering from an injury that's kept her from running, so she won't be as hard to keep up with for the time being. ;) Hopefully it's an energizing experience, and will push me to keep going. I know, it's only a walk, but baby steps right?
Now I just have to wake up early enough to do my makeup every morning...*that* might be a bigger challenge than you'd think...
And just to start prepping myself for "mother nature's stair master"...an image I found on Google of it...ugh! That's the halfway mark...and that's one of the nicer sections from the photos I've seen. YUCK! I'll have to start dong multiple sets of stairs every day as the summer goes on - hills just won't cut it! Wish me luck :p
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
Derry and brilliant craic
Well last night we were in Derry for the night. The ever charming & extremely knowledgeable Stephen McPhilemy lead us on a walking tour of the walled city.
Dinner was lovely, and then it was off to my fave bar in the world: Paedar O'Donnell's. The music was great as usual and the crowd was nice too. I didn't join the hostel bunch continuing the party after closing, I caught a cab home and slept blissfully in my private b&b room - definitely the way to travel! ;)
We're off to the Giant's Causeway and Carrick-a-Rede rope bridge today and then to Belfast for the night. It's not my fave place, but it's another b&b night so all's well! :)
Only 4 days left in Ireland...oh how time flies! :(
Dinner was lovely, and then it was off to my fave bar in the world: Paedar O'Donnell's. The music was great as usual and the crowd was nice too. I didn't join the hostel bunch continuing the party after closing, I caught a cab home and slept blissfully in my private b&b room - definitely the way to travel! ;)
We're off to the Giant's Causeway and Carrick-a-Rede rope bridge today and then to Belfast for the night. It's not my fave place, but it's another b&b night so all's well! :)
Only 4 days left in Ireland...oh how time flies! :(
Sunday, April 1, 2012
On tour again
So today I've been in Ireland for a week and it feels way longer, as usual. I had a great little bus family on the 4 day South West tour and already miss them *sniffles*
Yesterday I went to Palm Sunday service at Christ Church Cathedral. Wow. Such a great old church, so much history, everything's gorgeous.
Last night was nice and chilled, dinner from Tesco's at the hostel, drinks with other hostel folks and a drink at the pub before bed. No matter what I do I'm averaging 3-4 hrs sleep a night and it's killing me. Hopefully 2 nights in a b&b private room give me a chance to catch up.
Still lots to do in Ireland, but looking forward to sleeping in my own bed again for sure.
Yesterday I went to Palm Sunday service at Christ Church Cathedral. Wow. Such a great old church, so much history, everything's gorgeous.
Last night was nice and chilled, dinner from Tesco's at the hostel, drinks with other hostel folks and a drink at the pub before bed. No matter what I do I'm averaging 3-4 hrs sleep a night and it's killing me. Hopefully 2 nights in a b&b private room give me a chance to catch up.
Still lots to do in Ireland, but looking forward to sleeping in my own bed again for sure.
Friday, March 30, 2012
The joys of backpacker travel...
So I'm on my 3rd Paddywagon tour in 4 years, and the tour itself is great. The group of 7 that left on the 4 day south western tour with me Wednesday morning are great too - totally going to miss them all horribly!!!#
I just don't know how many more sleepless nights I can take...I'm soooo looking forward to a night where I can get 5 hours. I think that honestly, over the course of flying here Sunday night and the ensuing week, I've only had (wait...calculating...): 20 hours sleep over the course of 5 nights. That would have been more like 40 hours normally. I'm amazed I don't look like a zombie in my photos...but the beer and lack of sleep *are* starting to wear on me...think I'll take a break from drinking for a couple of nights!
Today we head to Blarney Castle and then back to Dublin for the Guinness Storehouse and the end of the tour. I'm sad to see it end but also glad to be getting off the bus...you can't feel your bum after a few hours! lol
Here's to a great weekend in Dublin!
I just don't know how many more sleepless nights I can take...I'm soooo looking forward to a night where I can get 5 hours. I think that honestly, over the course of flying here Sunday night and the ensuing week, I've only had (wait...calculating...): 20 hours sleep over the course of 5 nights. That would have been more like 40 hours normally. I'm amazed I don't look like a zombie in my photos...but the beer and lack of sleep *are* starting to wear on me...think I'll take a break from drinking for a couple of nights!
Today we head to Blarney Castle and then back to Dublin for the Guinness Storehouse and the end of the tour. I'm sad to see it end but also glad to be getting off the bus...you can't feel your bum after a few hours! lol
Here's to a great weekend in Dublin!
Sunday, March 25, 2012
On my way
Well, finally on my way!!!
Had a busy day, got all my packing done and relaxed a bit, very necessary considering that I'm still not feeling 100%. Saoirse went and moped in her bed but I'm sure she'll be fine.
The excitement for the evening was trying to find a place to have dinner by the airport...we ended up in Steveston. Apparently I'm a worse navigator than I thought! However, we found a nice little Greek restaurant and I made it to the airport in plenty of tome to check in.
I'm hoping to kick this cold or whatever it is right quick...I'll drown it in Guinness if I have to! ;)
Boarding starts soon, best go...
Had a busy day, got all my packing done and relaxed a bit, very necessary considering that I'm still not feeling 100%. Saoirse went and moped in her bed but I'm sure she'll be fine.
The excitement for the evening was trying to find a place to have dinner by the airport...we ended up in Steveston. Apparently I'm a worse navigator than I thought! However, we found a nice little Greek restaurant and I made it to the airport in plenty of tome to check in.
I'm hoping to kick this cold or whatever it is right quick...I'll drown it in Guinness if I have to! ;)
Boarding starts soon, best go...
Saturday, March 24, 2012
It's almost time...
I can hardly believe it, but in less than 24 hours I'll be on my way to Ireland for the 3rd time since September 2008. Clearly I'm a sucker for punishment, but if you know me very well, you already knew that. ;)
I spent the day learning what veils go where in the church (veiling Saturday leading into the home stretch of Lent and the approach of Easter - hooray!), and running around trying to sort out last minute items I needed for the trip. I had a bit of an issue this morning when someone who was supposed to help with Saoirse backed out at the last minute...so it wasn't the best start to my day. After working at the church I went to Mountain Equipment Co-op for a few things and had a run-in with the parking ticket machine. That thing is soooooo....there are no polite words for it. It declined the $1.50 charge for an hour's parking on my credit card 3 times. Normally I would have just left, but it was a sunny day, and a cute guy with a motor bike had struck up a conversation with me about the darned machine and he offered to pay my parking. So, despite all the complaining I do about buses, and bad drivers and people in general, it's nice to be reminded that there are genuinely nice people out there that you're bound to encounter now and then. Didn't hurt that he was cute of course ;)
I then spent the evening doing laundry and searching for items I *know* I own and have laid hands on in recent history, and yet cannot find for the life of me. I miss the days when Marisa was my roommate...she had an uncanny knack for finding whatever I'd misplaced...although it was usually because she did lots of the cleaning/organizing and I was slightly oblivious. LOL Still...I miss our little hunts for missing items around the house. She would totally know where my luggage scale is if she still lived here...I'll have to settle for tearing things apart tomorrow before she arrives to drive me to the airport in the evening.
As for packing, well, it's a four-letter word at this point. The laundry's still in process (2 baskets of it still to be folded and inspected to determine if the contents are going along with me or not), and I don't know 100% which luggage I'm using yet. This has Saoirse all wound up, because the sight of ANY luggage tells her what's going on, and multiple pieces sitting open, well they become convenient places to take a nap. Very helpful. Everything will be covered in fur when I get to Dublin...good times!
On that note, with my sad kitty sleeping on the bed next to me as I type, I'm going to log off and try to get some sleep. I have lots to do in the hours between waking and departing tomorrow and I'm sure (experience has taught me this...) that I will end up running behind no matter how early I start on my list.
Dublin here I come!!!
I spent the day learning what veils go where in the church (veiling Saturday leading into the home stretch of Lent and the approach of Easter - hooray!), and running around trying to sort out last minute items I needed for the trip. I had a bit of an issue this morning when someone who was supposed to help with Saoirse backed out at the last minute...so it wasn't the best start to my day. After working at the church I went to Mountain Equipment Co-op for a few things and had a run-in with the parking ticket machine. That thing is soooooo....there are no polite words for it. It declined the $1.50 charge for an hour's parking on my credit card 3 times. Normally I would have just left, but it was a sunny day, and a cute guy with a motor bike had struck up a conversation with me about the darned machine and he offered to pay my parking. So, despite all the complaining I do about buses, and bad drivers and people in general, it's nice to be reminded that there are genuinely nice people out there that you're bound to encounter now and then. Didn't hurt that he was cute of course ;)
I then spent the evening doing laundry and searching for items I *know* I own and have laid hands on in recent history, and yet cannot find for the life of me. I miss the days when Marisa was my roommate...she had an uncanny knack for finding whatever I'd misplaced...although it was usually because she did lots of the cleaning/organizing and I was slightly oblivious. LOL Still...I miss our little hunts for missing items around the house. She would totally know where my luggage scale is if she still lived here...I'll have to settle for tearing things apart tomorrow before she arrives to drive me to the airport in the evening.
As for packing, well, it's a four-letter word at this point. The laundry's still in process (2 baskets of it still to be folded and inspected to determine if the contents are going along with me or not), and I don't know 100% which luggage I'm using yet. This has Saoirse all wound up, because the sight of ANY luggage tells her what's going on, and multiple pieces sitting open, well they become convenient places to take a nap. Very helpful. Everything will be covered in fur when I get to Dublin...good times!
On that note, with my sad kitty sleeping on the bed next to me as I type, I'm going to log off and try to get some sleep. I have lots to do in the hours between waking and departing tomorrow and I'm sure (experience has taught me this...) that I will end up running behind no matter how early I start on my list.
Dublin here I come!!!
Monday, March 19, 2012
6 days until vacation
I can hardly believe it, but in 6 days I'll be heading to YVR to fly to Ireland!!!!!
This is my 3rd visit since fall 2008, and the least thought out I must admit. It looks like everything had been sorted out with the charges for my tours, I've booked a gorgeous hotel for the end of my trip, and British Airways sent a confirmation/welcome email regarding my flight this morning.
Today I went to the credit union and got some euros and British pounds, then went next door and got my travel insurance. Ian: it doesn't draw on PBC, it draws on MSP if necessary, I remembered to ask' ;)
So, I guess once I get the laundry done all that's left to do is pack...
I'm finally getting properly excited about this trip. It doesn't seem quite so unreal anymore.
This is my 3rd visit since fall 2008, and the least thought out I must admit. It looks like everything had been sorted out with the charges for my tours, I've booked a gorgeous hotel for the end of my trip, and British Airways sent a confirmation/welcome email regarding my flight this morning.
Today I went to the credit union and got some euros and British pounds, then went next door and got my travel insurance. Ian: it doesn't draw on PBC, it draws on MSP if necessary, I remembered to ask' ;)
So, I guess once I get the laundry done all that's left to do is pack...
I'm finally getting properly excited about this trip. It doesn't seem quite so unreal anymore.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Day 572...give or take a few...
Yes, I figured out how many days I've worked over the last 3 years, and come to the conclusion that today's transit trip was the start of Day 572.
Every day is an adventure, though generally one anticipated with trepidation.
Today's journey started with a bus driver who decided that holding our commute up to have a conversation with his greasy friend who was exiting the bus was entirely acceptable. The Skytrain wasn't SO bad, but there really is a point where no more adult human beings can safely fit into the space available. Note, I'm not saying comfortably, because comfort is the last thing on anyone's mind as they jam in cheek to jowl because goodness knows THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER TRAIN AGAIN!!! Wait, there's another one coming in 2 or 3 minutes? Screw that, I HAVE to be on this one! : p At least I assume that's what's going through the minds of the Transit zombies cramming themselves in next to me.
Production Station...ah what can I possibly say about the joyous wait for the 145 up the hill from Production Station that won't get me arrested? Hmm...it's...character building? I have witnessed so many feats of rudeness over the years, and yet it still amazes me on a daily basis. When you are at the back of a line that is hundreds of people deep, why is it acceptable to rush forward and shove yourself bodily into a gap that wouldn't fit a 2 year old at the back door of the bus? Not only are you not remotely important enough to negate the queuing protocol, but now the driver can't get the doors to close for the next 2 or 3 minutes, and by that point the next bus has pulled up behind it. Good job Einstein.
This morning's ride up the hill (I waited for the 3rd bus that came along, in order to get a seat) was everything I expected and more. That's not a positive thing.
The highlights of today's ride were the older woman who thunked her striped HBC bag down next to my head and grasped the post next to me for dear life, with her bag that's NOT a shoulder bag thrown across her body and onto my lap. I pushed it off my lap and she apologized. Then shoved it right back onto my lap. I eventually closed my eyes and pretended she wasn't there. Next to her was a charming young man who also thunked his bag down (why should anyone be forced to carry their own possessions when there's flat space available somewhere?? what was I thinking??), and proceeded to play air guitar against said bag. Now, air guitar is meant to be a silent thing...something that morons do on Transit along with their ipod...he clearly thought rubbing his bag was contributing to the music because that's what I got to listen to/observe all the way up the mountain. "scritch, scratch, scritchschritchscritchschrtchschraaaatch..." and on and on and on.
Here's hoping the ride home is less entertaining...?
Every day is an adventure, though generally one anticipated with trepidation.
Today's journey started with a bus driver who decided that holding our commute up to have a conversation with his greasy friend who was exiting the bus was entirely acceptable. The Skytrain wasn't SO bad, but there really is a point where no more adult human beings can safely fit into the space available. Note, I'm not saying comfortably, because comfort is the last thing on anyone's mind as they jam in cheek to jowl because goodness knows THERE WILL NEVER BE ANOTHER TRAIN AGAIN!!! Wait, there's another one coming in 2 or 3 minutes? Screw that, I HAVE to be on this one! : p At least I assume that's what's going through the minds of the Transit zombies cramming themselves in next to me.
Production Station...ah what can I possibly say about the joyous wait for the 145 up the hill from Production Station that won't get me arrested? Hmm...it's...character building? I have witnessed so many feats of rudeness over the years, and yet it still amazes me on a daily basis. When you are at the back of a line that is hundreds of people deep, why is it acceptable to rush forward and shove yourself bodily into a gap that wouldn't fit a 2 year old at the back door of the bus? Not only are you not remotely important enough to negate the queuing protocol, but now the driver can't get the doors to close for the next 2 or 3 minutes, and by that point the next bus has pulled up behind it. Good job Einstein.
This morning's ride up the hill (I waited for the 3rd bus that came along, in order to get a seat) was everything I expected and more. That's not a positive thing.
The highlights of today's ride were the older woman who thunked her striped HBC bag down next to my head and grasped the post next to me for dear life, with her bag that's NOT a shoulder bag thrown across her body and onto my lap. I pushed it off my lap and she apologized. Then shoved it right back onto my lap. I eventually closed my eyes and pretended she wasn't there. Next to her was a charming young man who also thunked his bag down (why should anyone be forced to carry their own possessions when there's flat space available somewhere?? what was I thinking??), and proceeded to play air guitar against said bag. Now, air guitar is meant to be a silent thing...something that morons do on Transit along with their ipod...he clearly thought rubbing his bag was contributing to the music because that's what I got to listen to/observe all the way up the mountain. "scritch, scratch, scritchschritchscritchschrtchschraaaatch..." and on and on and on.
Here's hoping the ride home is less entertaining...?
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Music and memory are funny things
So it's Sunday night, and I'm sitting in bed pondering the upcoming week with my ipod on shuffle next to me. Well, not quite shuffle, it's playing the 25 most played tracks, which heavily features Mumford & Sons and The Script...aaah moody boys singing about emotions.
A thought occurred to me, one that I believe has actually crossed my mind before, specifically linked to Mumford & Sons "I Gave You All", and that is: I really wish I could apologize to all of the perfectly normal guys that I've encountered over the years.
There's something about that song that I can't quite put my fingers on, but it really resonates with me. Maybe it's lines like "if only I had an enemy bigger than my apathy, I could have won". It really makes me think about all of the guys I've dismissed out of turn for some small fault or another, real or imagined; ok 99% of the faults were imagined, I admit it. Was I really so determined to maintain the status quo, so afraid of letting someone in, that I found it easier to unravel anything I started at the first stray thread?
There have been so many really great guys over the years that I completely discounted based on shallow, superficial, nonsensical "reasons". I hate to admit it, but my youngest brother once told me that I'd probably be married by now if I'd just stuck with it and given a guy a chance. There are two in particular that I think about, and to be perfectly honest, regret the way I handled things.
As usual, their names have been changed:
1) Sean: We met online 5 or 6 years ago when he answered an online dating ad I'd placed. I'll admit, I didn't even respond to his first couple of emails, mostly because he didn't include a photo, but also because I just didn't really feel anything when I read his emails...they seemed over the top. But on his third email he finally included a photo and I thought he was cute, so we struck up communication. We clicked, we chatted on the phone, texted, emailed, msn'd but never got around to meeting. He was living in a small apartment with a few other guys going to film school, and I was working full time and doing evening/correspondence classes trying to finish my history degree. That was one thing that I liked about him, he'd done a history degree as well. We had something in common as far as our academic interests went.
As time went on he got snippier when we were chatting, and I got more and more annoyed that we hadn't managed to meet in person. When he read a draft of one of my term papers one night and told me online how unoriginal it was and that my school clearly wasn't that good I lost it. We'd been chatting for a few months at that point, and I just didn't care after that. I cut off contact. At some point in the year after that I got back in touch, and we struck up our online friendship again. We finally got to meet in person, and I was excited because we were both single again (he'd been seeing someone when we first reconnected), and I thought this might be it!! I didn't feel a single spark and did my best to keep it on a friendly level from that point on. Over the next year or two we spoke/texted/chatted sporadically at best, but we were both changing. He'd always been sweet and relationship oriented, and I felt like he'd pursued me for the longest time...then suddenly he wasn't. He met someone again. Things got awkward because I had developed feelings for him again over the years of chatting...and when he said "You're one girl I wish I'd gotten to kiss", I felt he wasn't being fair.
So I started messing with his head a bit...intentionally. Telling him all about dates even once he was single again. Making sure he knew that other men found me interesting and appealing. I guess he figured it out, because he started to do similar things, and I finally got fed up and cut off communication again when he started asking if my cute room mate was single. We had been fighting off and on because he kept accusing me of being too negative, and taking myself too seriously. In retrospect he was 100% right. We didn't speak for a long time after that. At one point in 2011 I decided to email him and see how he was, because to be honest, I think about him and miss him more than I'd care to admit. I didn't know what to expect, but when he did write back it wasn't friendly or engaging. I had clearly done a number on him with my passive-aggressive b.s. back in the day. I'd messed up, and tried to explain that, and that I was sorry. I was rebuffed, softly, but essentially rebuffed.
Then I was going through my old phone just before Christmas this year and found his number. I copied it over to my blackberry and waited for New Year's Eve...and added it to the recipient list for my "Happy New Year!!" mass text, figuring that I could at least shrug it off if it wasn't his number anymore or something. 2 days after NYE he responded...saying that he was surprised I still had his number. We went back and forth a few messages, and I asked how life was etcetera. His response was...well, I'm going to say typical, because clearly he's not the same guy he was but I figure I deserve it...he told me that he'd moved to Burnaby 'with a gal' (I'm guessing a girlfriend? but...who knows...), and not to come on so strong and maybe he would message me sometime. Anyone else think that was a polite "fuck off"? So, when I hear "I Gave You All", I think about Sean in particular, and I'm not sure why...but it makes me regret the way I behaved because he was...and probably still is a REALLY great guy.
2) Jake: The story of Jake is MUCH shorter lol
We met online in the same way that I met Sean, except I messaged him from his ad this time. We hit it off, but I discounted him after a couple of msn chats because he kept bringing up his ex. I figured that he was carrying too much baggage (I know, pot, kettle, etcetera!). He kept on though, and we ended up meeting up for coffee one afternoon after I had a bad night with an ex and (I'm not ashamed to admit it) I needed a little esteem boost. He was great, engaging, intelligent, thought I was cute and smart and funny...what more could a girl want?? Well, after 3 hours or so of conversation in Starbucks we decided to make dinner back at my place, since my roommate & her boyfriend would be there for company. We stopped in for an errand or two I had to do on the way home, and that's when the 'faults' started to appear. He criticized my driving, something about me liking to stay in people's blind spots...because he could totally tell from the passenger seat? I don't know...it was odd. He had studied film in Ontario, and all the way through the movie he went on and on about themes, scores, cinematography, and basically ruined the entire movie. He made dinner, and apparently knew everything there was to know about cooking and food, at least that's how it came across. He was a know it all about anything we had a conversation about.
BUT he was sweet in his own way, he stayed the night and didn't make a move, even after a bottle of wine...and when I finally made a move, it was totally worth it. My roomie and I drove him home the next day, and he was really nice and normal still, even when I dropped him off...still normal. We both said we would talk when we talked, and see where it went. I figured the ball would be in my court if I wanted to see him again. Most guys wait 2-4 days right? WRONG.
Jake started texting and phoning the next day. By the end of the week I had about 20 texts and 5 or 6 missed called, the last few of which he started leaving voicemails. I suddenly realized what it feels like for a guy when a woman decides that she HAS TO make contact. It's stifling and a little bit frightening. I even tried talking to him and saying that I didn't expect this intensity of communication, especially since we'd said it was no big deal. Now, I may have led him on...because (a) I didn't tell him I wasn't looking for a relationship (I was heading to Ireland for a trip a month later...who wants to be tied down on vacation?? well that's where my head was at at THAT point :p), and (b) I didn't tell him to stop calling/texting, I just didn't answer. I figured that at some point he would take a hint and move on. I tend to be the queen of just not responding as a method of cutting ties. Most of the time it works within 2 or 3 communications. This guy was just..more determined.
It finally got to the point where I sent him an email telling him that my therapist (who didn't exist) didn't think that I should be dating at this point in my counselling. I figured it would be the fastest way to put an end to any interest the guy had in me. It didn't work! He told me that he respected that, but would still like to be a part of my life because he cared and wanted to be there for me in whatever capacity I wanted. In the end I told him I have 3 brothers who work in steel, and that I know where he lived and if he didn't want me to put matters into their hands, he was going to stop messaging me. Forever.
Now, he was less normal than Sean, but how do I know he wasn't just nervous? How do I know he wasn't a great guy that REALLY liked me, and was just on edge? My roommate thought he was a nice guy, I'm sure anyone I would have introduced him to would have liked him...but I found him too needy.
So, what's the moral of these two stories? Well, clearly I have a habit of driving nice guys crazy...or at least I did before I realized some of my bad habits and the assumptions I've made.
I really do wish I hadn't been so wrapped up in being an academic and taking myself seriously when I first met Sean, because he was a blast. There are so many conversations I've missed having with him over the years because I was too negative and drove him away, or because I did specific spiteful things, just to make him mad because he'd already made me mad. How pointless, and how spiteful I've been to myself.
As for Jake, well, I wish I could tell him there was no therapist and that he just came on way too strong...because he didn't deserve that.
I just wish I could tell them each these things...well, I've told Sean a few of these things, but I think that ship sailed a loooong time ago.
Hopefully I'll keep this all in mind with the next great guy I meet.
A thought occurred to me, one that I believe has actually crossed my mind before, specifically linked to Mumford & Sons "I Gave You All", and that is: I really wish I could apologize to all of the perfectly normal guys that I've encountered over the years.
There's something about that song that I can't quite put my fingers on, but it really resonates with me. Maybe it's lines like "if only I had an enemy bigger than my apathy, I could have won". It really makes me think about all of the guys I've dismissed out of turn for some small fault or another, real or imagined; ok 99% of the faults were imagined, I admit it. Was I really so determined to maintain the status quo, so afraid of letting someone in, that I found it easier to unravel anything I started at the first stray thread?
There have been so many really great guys over the years that I completely discounted based on shallow, superficial, nonsensical "reasons". I hate to admit it, but my youngest brother once told me that I'd probably be married by now if I'd just stuck with it and given a guy a chance. There are two in particular that I think about, and to be perfectly honest, regret the way I handled things.
As usual, their names have been changed:
1) Sean: We met online 5 or 6 years ago when he answered an online dating ad I'd placed. I'll admit, I didn't even respond to his first couple of emails, mostly because he didn't include a photo, but also because I just didn't really feel anything when I read his emails...they seemed over the top. But on his third email he finally included a photo and I thought he was cute, so we struck up communication. We clicked, we chatted on the phone, texted, emailed, msn'd but never got around to meeting. He was living in a small apartment with a few other guys going to film school, and I was working full time and doing evening/correspondence classes trying to finish my history degree. That was one thing that I liked about him, he'd done a history degree as well. We had something in common as far as our academic interests went.
As time went on he got snippier when we were chatting, and I got more and more annoyed that we hadn't managed to meet in person. When he read a draft of one of my term papers one night and told me online how unoriginal it was and that my school clearly wasn't that good I lost it. We'd been chatting for a few months at that point, and I just didn't care after that. I cut off contact. At some point in the year after that I got back in touch, and we struck up our online friendship again. We finally got to meet in person, and I was excited because we were both single again (he'd been seeing someone when we first reconnected), and I thought this might be it!! I didn't feel a single spark and did my best to keep it on a friendly level from that point on. Over the next year or two we spoke/texted/chatted sporadically at best, but we were both changing. He'd always been sweet and relationship oriented, and I felt like he'd pursued me for the longest time...then suddenly he wasn't. He met someone again. Things got awkward because I had developed feelings for him again over the years of chatting...and when he said "You're one girl I wish I'd gotten to kiss", I felt he wasn't being fair.
So I started messing with his head a bit...intentionally. Telling him all about dates even once he was single again. Making sure he knew that other men found me interesting and appealing. I guess he figured it out, because he started to do similar things, and I finally got fed up and cut off communication again when he started asking if my cute room mate was single. We had been fighting off and on because he kept accusing me of being too negative, and taking myself too seriously. In retrospect he was 100% right. We didn't speak for a long time after that. At one point in 2011 I decided to email him and see how he was, because to be honest, I think about him and miss him more than I'd care to admit. I didn't know what to expect, but when he did write back it wasn't friendly or engaging. I had clearly done a number on him with my passive-aggressive b.s. back in the day. I'd messed up, and tried to explain that, and that I was sorry. I was rebuffed, softly, but essentially rebuffed.
Then I was going through my old phone just before Christmas this year and found his number. I copied it over to my blackberry and waited for New Year's Eve...and added it to the recipient list for my "Happy New Year!!" mass text, figuring that I could at least shrug it off if it wasn't his number anymore or something. 2 days after NYE he responded...saying that he was surprised I still had his number. We went back and forth a few messages, and I asked how life was etcetera. His response was...well, I'm going to say typical, because clearly he's not the same guy he was but I figure I deserve it...he told me that he'd moved to Burnaby 'with a gal' (I'm guessing a girlfriend? but...who knows...), and not to come on so strong and maybe he would message me sometime. Anyone else think that was a polite "fuck off"? So, when I hear "I Gave You All", I think about Sean in particular, and I'm not sure why...but it makes me regret the way I behaved because he was...and probably still is a REALLY great guy.
2) Jake: The story of Jake is MUCH shorter lol
We met online in the same way that I met Sean, except I messaged him from his ad this time. We hit it off, but I discounted him after a couple of msn chats because he kept bringing up his ex. I figured that he was carrying too much baggage (I know, pot, kettle, etcetera!). He kept on though, and we ended up meeting up for coffee one afternoon after I had a bad night with an ex and (I'm not ashamed to admit it) I needed a little esteem boost. He was great, engaging, intelligent, thought I was cute and smart and funny...what more could a girl want?? Well, after 3 hours or so of conversation in Starbucks we decided to make dinner back at my place, since my roommate & her boyfriend would be there for company. We stopped in for an errand or two I had to do on the way home, and that's when the 'faults' started to appear. He criticized my driving, something about me liking to stay in people's blind spots...because he could totally tell from the passenger seat? I don't know...it was odd. He had studied film in Ontario, and all the way through the movie he went on and on about themes, scores, cinematography, and basically ruined the entire movie. He made dinner, and apparently knew everything there was to know about cooking and food, at least that's how it came across. He was a know it all about anything we had a conversation about.
BUT he was sweet in his own way, he stayed the night and didn't make a move, even after a bottle of wine...and when I finally made a move, it was totally worth it. My roomie and I drove him home the next day, and he was really nice and normal still, even when I dropped him off...still normal. We both said we would talk when we talked, and see where it went. I figured the ball would be in my court if I wanted to see him again. Most guys wait 2-4 days right? WRONG.
Jake started texting and phoning the next day. By the end of the week I had about 20 texts and 5 or 6 missed called, the last few of which he started leaving voicemails. I suddenly realized what it feels like for a guy when a woman decides that she HAS TO make contact. It's stifling and a little bit frightening. I even tried talking to him and saying that I didn't expect this intensity of communication, especially since we'd said it was no big deal. Now, I may have led him on...because (a) I didn't tell him I wasn't looking for a relationship (I was heading to Ireland for a trip a month later...who wants to be tied down on vacation?? well that's where my head was at at THAT point :p), and (b) I didn't tell him to stop calling/texting, I just didn't answer. I figured that at some point he would take a hint and move on. I tend to be the queen of just not responding as a method of cutting ties. Most of the time it works within 2 or 3 communications. This guy was just..more determined.
It finally got to the point where I sent him an email telling him that my therapist (who didn't exist) didn't think that I should be dating at this point in my counselling. I figured it would be the fastest way to put an end to any interest the guy had in me. It didn't work! He told me that he respected that, but would still like to be a part of my life because he cared and wanted to be there for me in whatever capacity I wanted. In the end I told him I have 3 brothers who work in steel, and that I know where he lived and if he didn't want me to put matters into their hands, he was going to stop messaging me. Forever.
Now, he was less normal than Sean, but how do I know he wasn't just nervous? How do I know he wasn't a great guy that REALLY liked me, and was just on edge? My roommate thought he was a nice guy, I'm sure anyone I would have introduced him to would have liked him...but I found him too needy.
So, what's the moral of these two stories? Well, clearly I have a habit of driving nice guys crazy...or at least I did before I realized some of my bad habits and the assumptions I've made.
I really do wish I hadn't been so wrapped up in being an academic and taking myself seriously when I first met Sean, because he was a blast. There are so many conversations I've missed having with him over the years because I was too negative and drove him away, or because I did specific spiteful things, just to make him mad because he'd already made me mad. How pointless, and how spiteful I've been to myself.
As for Jake, well, I wish I could tell him there was no therapist and that he just came on way too strong...because he didn't deserve that.
I just wish I could tell them each these things...well, I've told Sean a few of these things, but I think that ship sailed a loooong time ago.
Hopefully I'll keep this all in mind with the next great guy I meet.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Why the ex is an ex...doesn't usually change over time...
Hey everyone, sorry it's been so long, there's been a lot going on since Christmas/New Year's. The cat's better now (yay!), there's no water coming through my ceiling, and work is tolerable (which is a huge leap up from where it has been in the past LOL).
With all of that being said, it's easy to see why I haven't had time to get out and date or find fodder for blogging isn't it? Well, as luck would have it, a few days after I told a friend I'd run out of stuff to blog for the time being...I ran into an ex. The universe gave me plenty of material in that chance encounter and the texting session that followed a couple of nights later.
Let's call him...Jack...that works...it's short, simple, and representative of his personality as a jackass. LOL I'm not bitter, really, but I AM completely amazed that I was into this guy my last 2 years of high school and panted after him for at least 3 years after that. We met in Math 11 in high school, even though he was in grade 10. He sat in front of me, and decided to taste my lip balm one day...it was one of those tins with a lid as opposed to a tube. For whatever reason it was the start of a weird friendship/something more that I couldn't shake for 5 years or so.
He was an athlete on one of the local teams, smart, cute in his own way, and charming enough to get pretty much whatever from whomever he wanted. The problem was that while I fell partially under his charms it drove me nuts, and I was constantly ticked off at him.
As time went on we both ended up at the same college, and since we lived in the same neighborhood we ended up seeing a fair bit of one another which eventually morphed into a not quite relationship. One night, towards the end of this 5 year hassle, we finally hooked up...and it was abysmal, horrible, catastrophic, whatever you want to call it, that was it. Our friendship died within a few weeks and a couple of shouted arguments on public transit later. Not a proud memory, but hey...
I think about him now and then, mainly when I see his parents' place (I still live in the old neighborhood), or come across a tin of peppermint lip balm...but I don't think of him much and given that it's been 8 years, that's a good thing. And then I ran into him at the Skytrain last week.
He was in town for 2 days for some task, staying with his folks. We chatted briefly, then my bus came and I left after giving him my number and saying he should text me so we could catch up. He started with the jabs as soon as I left, texting to say it was him and making sure it worked because "I didn't want to ignore you again". I told him I was going to let that jab slide and he laughed. I wrote back to have a good time visiting the folks and figured that was that. The thing I couldn't help thinking as I mulled over the conversation, was that he hadn't asked me a single thing about myself or what I'd been up to for the last 8 years, and when I tried to share anything he talked right over top of it and told me more about his fantastic life. I don't remember if he did that when we were younger, but he was never the best listener and had clearly gotten MUCH worse with time.
The following night I got a text saying he was horny. How charming! I declared that that was too bad, that I was getting ready for bed. He asked if I'd like to see some pictures...then proceeded to send several unbidden. My poor phone needs to be disinfected at this point :p
The best part of the conversation was when he said "I have a girlfriend". So I figured he was just messing with me about the horny/pictures, being a dog, the usual. I said "That's great, have fun with that." His next message shocked me..."But we have an arrangement/understanding." I was then regaled with the understanding that they have and the rules she has for him to sleep with other people. It blew my mind. I thought that was the worst thing I'd read until I received this: "So? You interested? My **** is willing and ready ;)". I never ever EVER thought I would be in the position to say the following to anyone "Gee, thanks, but no. I make a point of never getting involved with another woman's guy."
What the heck?!?!?!?!?
He took it reasonably, wished me a good night (after some more attempts to convince me to meet up with him), and that was that.
I told a girlfriend about it and she asked "Where do you MEET these creeps?? Why are they drawn to you?" I'd love to say that I met him in a bar, or he was some guy off the net I barely knew, or some other random excuse...but we were kids together in New West. Just goes to show you that the guy/girl next store - not necessarily a decent person. LOL
With all of that being said, it's easy to see why I haven't had time to get out and date or find fodder for blogging isn't it? Well, as luck would have it, a few days after I told a friend I'd run out of stuff to blog for the time being...I ran into an ex. The universe gave me plenty of material in that chance encounter and the texting session that followed a couple of nights later.
Let's call him...Jack...that works...it's short, simple, and representative of his personality as a jackass. LOL I'm not bitter, really, but I AM completely amazed that I was into this guy my last 2 years of high school and panted after him for at least 3 years after that. We met in Math 11 in high school, even though he was in grade 10. He sat in front of me, and decided to taste my lip balm one day...it was one of those tins with a lid as opposed to a tube. For whatever reason it was the start of a weird friendship/something more that I couldn't shake for 5 years or so.
He was an athlete on one of the local teams, smart, cute in his own way, and charming enough to get pretty much whatever from whomever he wanted. The problem was that while I fell partially under his charms it drove me nuts, and I was constantly ticked off at him.
As time went on we both ended up at the same college, and since we lived in the same neighborhood we ended up seeing a fair bit of one another which eventually morphed into a not quite relationship. One night, towards the end of this 5 year hassle, we finally hooked up...and it was abysmal, horrible, catastrophic, whatever you want to call it, that was it. Our friendship died within a few weeks and a couple of shouted arguments on public transit later. Not a proud memory, but hey...
I think about him now and then, mainly when I see his parents' place (I still live in the old neighborhood), or come across a tin of peppermint lip balm...but I don't think of him much and given that it's been 8 years, that's a good thing. And then I ran into him at the Skytrain last week.
He was in town for 2 days for some task, staying with his folks. We chatted briefly, then my bus came and I left after giving him my number and saying he should text me so we could catch up. He started with the jabs as soon as I left, texting to say it was him and making sure it worked because "I didn't want to ignore you again". I told him I was going to let that jab slide and he laughed. I wrote back to have a good time visiting the folks and figured that was that. The thing I couldn't help thinking as I mulled over the conversation, was that he hadn't asked me a single thing about myself or what I'd been up to for the last 8 years, and when I tried to share anything he talked right over top of it and told me more about his fantastic life. I don't remember if he did that when we were younger, but he was never the best listener and had clearly gotten MUCH worse with time.
The following night I got a text saying he was horny. How charming! I declared that that was too bad, that I was getting ready for bed. He asked if I'd like to see some pictures...then proceeded to send several unbidden. My poor phone needs to be disinfected at this point :p
The best part of the conversation was when he said "I have a girlfriend". So I figured he was just messing with me about the horny/pictures, being a dog, the usual. I said "That's great, have fun with that." His next message shocked me..."But we have an arrangement/understanding." I was then regaled with the understanding that they have and the rules she has for him to sleep with other people. It blew my mind. I thought that was the worst thing I'd read until I received this: "So? You interested? My **** is willing and ready ;)". I never ever EVER thought I would be in the position to say the following to anyone "Gee, thanks, but no. I make a point of never getting involved with another woman's guy."
What the heck?!?!?!?!?
He took it reasonably, wished me a good night (after some more attempts to convince me to meet up with him), and that was that.
I told a girlfriend about it and she asked "Where do you MEET these creeps?? Why are they drawn to you?" I'd love to say that I met him in a bar, or he was some guy off the net I barely knew, or some other random excuse...but we were kids together in New West. Just goes to show you that the guy/girl next store - not necessarily a decent person. LOL
Thursday, January 5, 2012
New year...new...what??
Well we’ve made it to 2012, and regardless of what the media/conspiracy theorists/Mayan predictions/doomsday floggers say, it’s a new year full of hope. Right?
What does this mean? Renewal? A “fresh start”? These are tricky terms and can mean so many things…
- Out with the old, in with the new…which so often ends up just like the old anyways. After all, we tend towards the familiar and comfortable.
- Resolutions. What a dirty word!! Maybe my best friend is right, don’t have resolutions, set goals – attainable ones at that.
- “Turning over a new leaf”. Some people totally abandon their old rites/routines/preferences in an effort to find something that will work better. After all, isn’t the definition of insanity repeating the same thing over and over yet expecting different results? However, abandoning everything isn’t really the answer either…catch 22 eh?
I for one am working through the concept of renewal and growth on a couple of different levels.
First, I’m working on spiritual renewal and building a foundation there. By the grace of God and the love and support of friends and church family, it’s working, but man is it ever difficult some days!! Couple that with the stress of the holidays and New Year’s and returning to work after a couple of weeks around the house, and it’s enough to do anyone’s head in isn’t it??
Then there’s the physical renewal. It’s the old “I’ll get fit and healthy THIS YEAR” shtick. We all say it, every year, and some make it through a week or two of sticking to it, some a month or two, and some of us fall off the wagon the first week we have to get up for work again. I tend to fall into the group that makes the resolution but never meets a single appointment with her yoga pants…insomnia and responsibilities usually get to me before I muster up the energy.
Third, the general focus of this blog: dating & relating. Aaaah, you knew I had to return to it eventually didn’t you? ;) Given my previous forays in dating, it’s clear that I’ve been using the insanity method. I always expect a different result, despite the fact that I’ve basically been dating the same men over and over, just with different hair styles and emotional issues. I’ve also had some issues with friends over the last several months. One gal who was a recent acquaintance met up with me for girls’ night, then proceeded to tell me how tired she was, and that she’d almost bailed on our plans. By the end of the night I wished she had. When I messaged her thinking she was still in the ladies room at one point I was told she was halfway home on the train and that I “couldn’t treat [her] that way and expect [her] to stay”. Apparently the fact that a couple of guys struck up conversations with me was completely out of line, especially since I talked back. I’ve never experienced anything quite like it! The outcome of her bad mood that evening was me drunk and alone in a Vancouver bar…having to call my parents for a ride home. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, at 29, I had to phone for a ride home because I was ditched and had too much to drink. Also, Granville Street at midnight or later is really not a fun place to be walking alone, I’m just sayin’! That friendship ended by the time I got home, the advent of Facebook and all its shunning powers at work in the middle of the night.
So what is it that draws me to be friends or date people that are clearly not going to work out in the long run? Well, a large part of it is that I want to believe that everyone’s worth my time, has value and could be great to hang out with. The thing is that so many people make great first or second impressions, only to unravel completely when you pull the first stray thread on their façade.
I’ve started looking at friends like hockey teams, and it’s all thanks to one of my hard hitting forwards, a friend who’s relentless in his pursuit of…I’m not sure what, but he occasionally flips to defense, and he’s a solid friend so he’s not going anywhere. I was talking about an acquaintance/casual friend recently, and admittedly complaining about what I felt was boorish behavior (though nothing like the night out incident!), when he asked “Is she a recent acquisition?” I laughed and thought that was pretty apt, especially when she pulled something recently and it occurred to me, the trade deadline’s near…so I texted my friend and told him “I don’t think she’ll make it past the deadline”.
Wouldn’t it be great if the world worked like hockey? Penalties get handed out (unless you’re a Canucks fan…that’s a whole different story for us haha), people serve their minutes, the game goes on. If you’re offside, play’s stopped. If the puck goes out of play, play’s stopped. You know, basic stuff…why can’t relationships be governed like that? I think I may have to start using these guidelines in my life and see where it goes. Instead of 2 minutes for unsportsmanlike conduct, we’ll give 2 days. Not sure what the parameters would be, but I think it’s doable. Might be fun to come up with a
What do you think?
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
Quick update on Dating in Metro Vancouver!
So, I fell off the blog wagon in the fall when health/surgical recovery issues took me down for a while. Thankfully I'm back up and mostly mended now! I know you're all DYING to read my inane prattle, just admit it...there's no shame..well, a little, but not much. ;)
When last I wrote I had started to chronicle my recent (if I went back further I'd have to write a book I think!) dating adventures in the Lower Mainland. In the interest of getting the rest off my chest and moving on to newer topics and discussions I'm going to summarize them in rapid succession. Hold onto your hats!
**All names have been changed**
1) Curtis: Personal trainer, former actor. Try watching tv or a movie with THIS guy!! The bitterness that he never got a real foothold in the industry isn't concealed in the slightest. He's openly hostile and critical of actors, especially those that have had the misfortune to work with him (and yes, he has worked with some big ones in small roles, I was made to watch a couple as proof haha). We had 2 dates and he managed to ruin the entertainment portion of each really well. Then there was the chip on his shoulder. The most memorable example being when I exclaimed that something he said/thought was cute and he said "When you say that it makes me feel like you think I'm stupid. I don't like that." I really, really, really wanted to say "man up" but I bit my tongue. If only I had tossed him at that point I wouldn't have gotten to experience his other...let's call it...dysfunction. Anyways, good times...not! Hope I don't run into that man-boy any time soon!
2) Max: Tradesman I met through work. Here's proof that the "Missed Connections" section on Craigslist actually works! He was doing some contract work on campus this summer and he caught my eye. I posted a missed connection figuring it couldn't hurt, and when I got back from vacation I had an email from him. He was able to confirm his identity through email and we set about to talking. He was worried about the fact that he's older and has kids, which wasn't a big deal for me. The thing that I had a problem with was his foot fetish. Yup, foot fetish. Keep in mind he didn't even make a date or attempt to get to know me before telling me that he likes "toes that look like little rolled pieces of cookie dough with red smarties on the end". SERIOUSLY, I could not make that up if I wanted to - and why would I want to?? I tried for a couple of days to wrap my head around it, but in the end I told him I just couldn't deal with it. He was surprisingly nice and that was that.
3) Andrew: Works in northern Alberta, was home for a couple of months on turnaround. We met up after talking on POF for an evening and he got really touchy feely right off the bat. Thankfully it was a work night so I begged off early and sent him on his way, but not before he managed to snag a kiss. He then texted to tell me how much he enjoyed the kiss when he got home, and what else he'd like to have done. And proceeded to spend the next couple of days telling me "It's a guy's job to try to get in his woman's pants, even when she doesn't want him to." I told him to stop contacting me after that message. Where do they get their manners???
4) Zack: In the service industry. I've known of him, and had friends in common in the past so was definitely interested in getting together and seeing what we had in common. Bad move, should have let it remain a mystery haha Nothing in common...yet another Vancouverite guy going to film school with no real sense of where he's headed in life. Except he's 38. Too bad it didn't work out, I really did want to be left wondering where he was nights when he wasn't working or when he would meet some 'actress' and ditch me. Darn! ;)
5) Paul: Professor at a local university. Nice guy, alright looking, educated, English accent, thinks I'm amazing and attractive, didn't try to to anything except hug me when we met. The whole package right? Except no chemistry...at least not on my end. I tried soooo hard to like him, he texted regularly, wanted to get together, had all sorts of ideas for what we could do together...but I pulled a fade-out. I just couldn't make myself like him enough. Nothing wrong with him, and I hope he meets someone great, but in the end it wasn't going to work out. Plus he was anti-religion, so that doesn't work with an Anglo-Catholic girl, now does it?? ;)
Right! There's the quick version of dating in the end of 2011.
I've managed to avoid making any poor dating choices since...let's say October...yeah that sounds about right. That may be because I've stopped meeting anyone that doesn't really spark something in me over email, so I haven't met anyone since then haha.
The one fellow that has attempted to talk to me in 2012 (all 4 days of it so far haha) was on Plentyoffish the other night. He was on Vancouver Island so I thought it was odd, but some people go back and forth regularly so I accepted the message/chat. He was...not...he...I can't describe him politely. Hmm...he wanted to chat on Skype because MSN wasn't cooperating so we did, and when he logged on he looked like he could have fit in well with the Trailer Park Boys, and actually made them look attractive...get the picture?? He then started talking about nudity and living alone and how great it was and that he was nude from the waist down. So I started talking about church :D the conversation ended REALLY quickly after that hahahahaha
Aaaaaaaaah it takes all kinds, I just don't want them in MY life!!!
Onto the next experience, right? ;)
When last I wrote I had started to chronicle my recent (if I went back further I'd have to write a book I think!) dating adventures in the Lower Mainland. In the interest of getting the rest off my chest and moving on to newer topics and discussions I'm going to summarize them in rapid succession. Hold onto your hats!
**All names have been changed**
1) Curtis: Personal trainer, former actor. Try watching tv or a movie with THIS guy!! The bitterness that he never got a real foothold in the industry isn't concealed in the slightest. He's openly hostile and critical of actors, especially those that have had the misfortune to work with him (and yes, he has worked with some big ones in small roles, I was made to watch a couple as proof haha). We had 2 dates and he managed to ruin the entertainment portion of each really well. Then there was the chip on his shoulder. The most memorable example being when I exclaimed that something he said/thought was cute and he said "When you say that it makes me feel like you think I'm stupid. I don't like that." I really, really, really wanted to say "man up" but I bit my tongue. If only I had tossed him at that point I wouldn't have gotten to experience his other...let's call it...dysfunction. Anyways, good times...not! Hope I don't run into that man-boy any time soon!
2) Max: Tradesman I met through work. Here's proof that the "Missed Connections" section on Craigslist actually works! He was doing some contract work on campus this summer and he caught my eye. I posted a missed connection figuring it couldn't hurt, and when I got back from vacation I had an email from him. He was able to confirm his identity through email and we set about to talking. He was worried about the fact that he's older and has kids, which wasn't a big deal for me. The thing that I had a problem with was his foot fetish. Yup, foot fetish. Keep in mind he didn't even make a date or attempt to get to know me before telling me that he likes "toes that look like little rolled pieces of cookie dough with red smarties on the end". SERIOUSLY, I could not make that up if I wanted to - and why would I want to?? I tried for a couple of days to wrap my head around it, but in the end I told him I just couldn't deal with it. He was surprisingly nice and that was that.
3) Andrew: Works in northern Alberta, was home for a couple of months on turnaround. We met up after talking on POF for an evening and he got really touchy feely right off the bat. Thankfully it was a work night so I begged off early and sent him on his way, but not before he managed to snag a kiss. He then texted to tell me how much he enjoyed the kiss when he got home, and what else he'd like to have done. And proceeded to spend the next couple of days telling me "It's a guy's job to try to get in his woman's pants, even when she doesn't want him to." I told him to stop contacting me after that message. Where do they get their manners???
4) Zack: In the service industry. I've known of him, and had friends in common in the past so was definitely interested in getting together and seeing what we had in common. Bad move, should have let it remain a mystery haha Nothing in common...yet another Vancouverite guy going to film school with no real sense of where he's headed in life. Except he's 38. Too bad it didn't work out, I really did want to be left wondering where he was nights when he wasn't working or when he would meet some 'actress' and ditch me. Darn! ;)
5) Paul: Professor at a local university. Nice guy, alright looking, educated, English accent, thinks I'm amazing and attractive, didn't try to to anything except hug me when we met. The whole package right? Except no chemistry...at least not on my end. I tried soooo hard to like him, he texted regularly, wanted to get together, had all sorts of ideas for what we could do together...but I pulled a fade-out. I just couldn't make myself like him enough. Nothing wrong with him, and I hope he meets someone great, but in the end it wasn't going to work out. Plus he was anti-religion, so that doesn't work with an Anglo-Catholic girl, now does it?? ;)
Right! There's the quick version of dating in the end of 2011.
I've managed to avoid making any poor dating choices since...let's say October...yeah that sounds about right. That may be because I've stopped meeting anyone that doesn't really spark something in me over email, so I haven't met anyone since then haha.
The one fellow that has attempted to talk to me in 2012 (all 4 days of it so far haha) was on Plentyoffish the other night. He was on Vancouver Island so I thought it was odd, but some people go back and forth regularly so I accepted the message/chat. He was...not...he...I can't describe him politely. Hmm...he wanted to chat on Skype because MSN wasn't cooperating so we did, and when he logged on he looked like he could have fit in well with the Trailer Park Boys, and actually made them look attractive...get the picture?? He then started talking about nudity and living alone and how great it was and that he was nude from the waist down. So I started talking about church :D the conversation ended REALLY quickly after that hahahahaha
Aaaaaaaaah it takes all kinds, I just don't want them in MY life!!!
Onto the next experience, right? ;)
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