So, for all you folks who wonder where I find the freaks...here's a case in point. I don't find them, they find ME!
I went to Chapters yesterday out on Pinetree, because they were supposed to have a couple of books I wanted (even though it turned out stock was inaccurate online, boo!!), and ended up getting help from a super cute guy working there. Now, he was nice and normal and I posted a Missed Connection on Craigslist because I figured, what's the worst that could happen?
Answer: some strange guy named Darrell who was NOT the cute Chapters guy could email and try to strike something up, all the while alternating between creepy and nice...but then ending up on creepy for the final descent.
What started off as a nice enough "Did you have any luck from your posting? You sounded sweet..." turned into "I'm ok with the church thing, are you ok that I'm bi?" Oh yes, there was more fun after that. I tried pulling out all the stops, like "I'm super involved with church, go every Sunday, have made a decision not to be sexually active until I'm in a totally committed relationship and have a guarantee of good health, and I'm looking for the one and want to have kids in the next 5 years"
None of that scared him off...instead, the idea of marriage and kids apparently fits into a fetish he has for getting the woman he someday marries pregnant and getting to have sex with her pregnant...and something to do with breast milk...I've stopped trying to figure it all out at this point. Oh yeah, he was special...he said "That's why I'm waiting for the right girl"
Uh huh...which is why you're bi right? He asked if I'd ever been with 2 guys at one point in the conversation. I just sat there and thought about it for a minute...wondering...should I have some fun with this and see what reaction different responses I give could garner? Or should I just be honest and shoot from the hip...I went with honest and said "Nope, and it's definitely not on my bucket list." I totally didn't expect him to say "That's ok, I only have relationships with women." So I was dying to know and asked "But you have sex with men?" He said, "Only in threesomes, and I don't need to have them, they're just a nice bonus."
Oh, he also wanted to talk about all sorts of intimate things, and asked for a picture that 'showcased' my boobs. Yeah that request was denied...
So, I gave it one more shot, asked him some normal human being conversation "get to know you" questions. I joked that he was avoiding them, and his response was "I don't really give a shit. Sorry. If you don't want to talk to me then that's cool."
And that was that. After a whole whack of emails and some texts. So bizarre.
I guess when I joked that the universe wasn't giving me much dating fodder for this blog, I should have been careful what I wished for.
But hey, at least I'm ditching them quicker...this one didn't even make it to the first date...that's progress right?
SERIOUSLY, where do they all come from, and why do they feel the draw to contact ME?!!?!? LOL I'm completely flabbergasted...
It would be nice to meet a keeper though...where the heck are they all hiding??
And more importantly, are there ANY nice, single, straight, sane, at least moderately attractive 20 or 30 something Anglican men in the Lower Mainland? Come on...is it asking sooooo much?
Anyone know any? LOL
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