Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Skewed importance given digital time...

So, just a short post today, but I thought that this subject warranted some sort of discussion when it popped into my head last night.

I'm in a few different social groups on one level or another...a metaphysics focused book club, my church, friends I've met working at the university over the years, friends from high school, friends from my travels, etcetera Recently I added an acquaintance from one of these circles on Facebook. I figured that since we spend time together in real life, and we've exchanged ideas and laughs and have friends in common, well why not. Social media is after all how a lot of communication and exchange of ideas happen.

Last night I thought "I haven't gotten a response from person x yet, I'll take a peek at their profile..." When I got to said profile, the friend request button once again said "+1 Add Friend", not "Friend Request Pending". Huh.

I sat there for a minute and pondered this, because I had just seen this person a few days earlier and laughed and chatted one on one and in a group. The conclusion I came to was this: I'm not worthy of their digital time. I know, it's a bizarre notion...but we all make determinations of who we will share our digital selves with, either by utilizing security settings, or watching what we post where and when, or who we allow access to our profiles and pages.

The thing that bothers me most about this particular situation isn't the fact that they have decided to (quite obviously) exclude me from online contact. The part that bothers me most is how skewed our society has become towards the "importance" of online and the digital world. My mother and grandmother complain about it constantly, how our generation has no sense of how to behave properly, of manners, or sensitivity towards others who aren't immersed in the digital age. They may actually be on to something...

When I add a person on Facebook or other social media, it's because I have met them at some point in the real world, even if it was only a chance meeting at a book signing or something like that. If I wouldn't happily engage you in conversation face to face, why would I share my vacation photos or my angsts and triumphs with you? As a result, I have pared my "friends" list down to around 150 people, all of whom I consider at least an acquaintance, the bulk though are friends and family.

What this person has done, and many others (think of those people who have thousands of "friends"...what is that all about, really?!), is disconnect from real human relationships to a large degree. If you will spend time with someone in real life and discuss important events or break bread with them, what on earth could be so important about your Facebook, Myspace, LinkedIn or any other social media or online messaging, that you wouldn't share with them?

I think it's time for people to reevaluate their priorities. I know I will definitely be looking at certain people I encounter in my daily life who have imposed online embargoes on people in a different light.

Thoughts? Comments.

No comments:

Post a Comment